Spring Horoscopes

Dima Aboukasm and Marie Hua

Sagittarius: You may be feeling drowsy during the day. Be sure to get enough sleep- that Instagram post can wait until tomorrow. Make sure you get your work done and turn it in on time, and maybe even show up early to class! Ms. Swol will be extra pleasant towards you if you do this (whether you take her class or not). Your lucky number is 1. Interpret that however you will and it will come true.

Taurus: You should attend many school events this spring. The arts are flourishing and you may hear a very specific message that will help with your studies, especially Calculus. Everything is connected, and you never know when inspiration will come. Even if that AP US History is giving you a rough time, stay positive! It will pay off in the long run. Your lucky word is “preantepenultimate.” Look it up— it comes from Latin.

Pisces: The next two months will be full of stress, but keep your head up and you will find joy in places you wouldn’t think it would be. Life will feel tedious and repetitive as the school year moves on; mix it up and do something random! Look up a cheeto smoothie recipe or research the elusive fire breathing squirrel. Buy canned goat brains on Amazon.com (and make someone else eat them), and learn morse code. Go to a random number generator and hit go: that is your lucky number this month!

Aries: Beware of ducks. For real. You never know when one of those devilish creatures will sneak around the corner with a nerf gun and a bad attitude. Keep an eye out around the Student Center. Aside from that, this month you should try and step out of your comfort zone. Meet some new people, or participate in a community service project in town. This month is also a good time to learn a new skill like juggling, always winning at tic-tac-toe, or multiplying without a calculator. You never know when something like that will come in handy.  

Virgo: The long-awaited final season of Game of Thrones is here! Watch it- you won’t be disappointed, although there will be an unexpected death around the third episode. However, don’t get too involved with the Whites and the Iron Throne before you’ve taken care of that project that’s due tomorrow. John Snow (Targaryen :P) and Mr. Del Nero will thank you.

Scorpio: Eat lots of Mac N’ Cheese. If you happen to be vegan, then eat vegan Mac ‘n’ Cheese. It will bring you good fortune and more cheese. You will have more free time than usual this month, so go and hang out with friends, watch a movie, or have a campfire. Also, go on more walks this week. You might see a deer or bear wandering around town, and be sure to wear lots of bug repellent!

Cancer: The spring season means you will struggle with keeping focused on your studies. Cancers have a tendency to get very distracted, but with a little bit of dedicated time to focus on your work you will be all set. Don’t forget to have some fun too! Watch out for any stray cats or dogs, this could send bad luck your way!

Capricorn: AP exams are around the corner and you, my friend, are out of luck! Study up or take the 1, buttercup. You will have luck with prom though- looks like you have a fun night in store! And even if you’re not going to prom, don’t worry; the stars are aligned in your corner this season so other good things are on the way! Your lucky number is 3 for the month of April and 5 for the month of May.

Leo: You should try out a new flavor of coffee at Dunkin Donuts— this will help you discover some new passions which lay at the bottom of an empty coffee cup. Adventure is always around the corner so keep your eyes peeled for where the wind may blow. Make sure your visa or passport is up to date— your summer holds some exciting travels!

Aquarius: This season brings quite a bit of opportunity your way, Aquarius! With so many doors opening, it will be hard to determine what the right path is, but remember to keep yourself grounded amongst all the chaos. Reading, music, and poetry may aid you in making decisions and keep you centered.

Gemini: Beware of getting on your teachers’ bad sides this spring! Your edge is especially sharp this season and you may have one too many words to say when things don’t go your way! Make sure you find an outlet for your emotions so that things keep sailing smoothly until the end of the year. Remember, summer is just around the corner and then you’ll be free! Your lucky object this season will be an aloe vera plant— smooth, soothing, and cool is the way!

Libra: Procrastination is not your friend this season! With so much coming up in your life, you will be tempted to set it all aside for Netflix or your other favorite distractions, but you want to end the year strong, so remind yourself to stay on top of your work! Besides that, you should consider a new hobby such as knitting or ping pong— this could bring some variety into your life. Don’t forget to keep your eyes out for the color beige this season; it could throw everything off balance!