Transportation, Witches, and Sleep… a Typical High School Story

What kind of noise does a witch’s vehicle make?

Dear amateur comedian, 

I have consulted my dictionary writers and resident dad joke experts. I have received the response: BROOM BROOM! 

See ya later, alligator,

– Creampuff

I have a complaint! You should be able to PROVE that all your homework is done then in study hall, then you could play games. ONLY if you prove your homework is done. 

Dear avid gamer, 

I remember thinking the same thing when I was a young creampuff. It’s a strange process to prove that you are truly finished, and sometimes you just need to relieve some stress with a game. Maybe talk to a teacher about it and find out more! 

Live long and prosper,

– Creampuff

Why am I always tired?

Dear sleepless confidant,

Alas, a problem I experienced in my days as a young pastry scholar. While good sleep can be hard to come by in a world of homework and tests, it’s important to get a healthy 8 hours of sleep a night. Being in good health comes before video games and looming deadlines, so get to bed a bit earlier to try to combat the constant fatigue. Staying off your electronic devices at least an hour before bed can promote sleep as well. If fatigue persists, think about consulting a doctor. I may have been a scholar, but not the doctor kind of scholar. 

Make like a banana and split,

– Creampuff

Why are my friends mean?

Dear heartbroken friend,

While friends can be occasionally cruel in the name of good fun, maybe try expressing that you are hurt by some of the things they say or do. If all else fails, do like a Creampuff and spit out Shakespearean insults. “Out of my sight! Thou dost infect my eyes. (Richard III).” That might do the trick.

With love and satire,

– Creampuff