The Magnet’s anonymous advice columnist is here to answer all your questions and concerns. Drop her a letter in his special box in the library. They will be so happy to help!


Creampuff, Advice Columnist

Question: What will America be like in 2 years?

Answer: I’m not quite sure what America will be like in two years. I would like to think the country is strong enough to not implode by then. Hopefully, people will come together and make the country a better place.

Question: How do you not stress over tests?

Answer: You have two options. One is to blissfully ignore your responsibilities completely, and just sleep. You will probably fail, but at least you won’t stress before it. Option number two is to get yourself more prepared. As a procrastinator, I know it is easy to put off studying until the absolute last minute. Plan out your week, and schedule study times for yourself.

Question: I’m always eating. What should I do?

Answer: I love to eat too, but as we all know, too much of anything is a bad thing. Try to eat more in moderation, and hit the gym every once in awhile. You’re in middle school or high school, you’ll be fine. Also, please avoid eating too many pastries- I hate watching my cousins get eaten.

Question: My dog thinks that he is a cat. Sometimes he purrs and licks himself clean. What should I do?

Answer: You should definitely get that checked out. Maybe he is confused. I have so many questions. Does he do everything in a passive aggressive manner like my cat? Does he enjoy being petted? Does he get along with other dogs? Cats? I would love to meet this dog of yours.